"Inside the Bachelor Pad"

[Sephiroth]

I decided that with the flurry of Giants books out now, I'm going to write one called "Inside the Bachelor Pad," where I describe my 25 years as a lifelong Giants fan. Among the scandalous revelations I plan to include:

 

When the New York Giants won the 1986 Superbowl, my parents and their friends kept me up until 10 PM, when my bedtime was CLEARLY 8:30. The next day, I flunked a Math test in Mrs. Mason's fourth grade class. I never recovered from this and was doomed to suck at math forever, all because my parents let me indulge in my Giants obsession.

 

Later on when the Giants won again in 1990, my dad decided to break open a bottle of Champagne. I had an ENTIRE glass, even though I was only in seventh grade. The taste of alcohol would not leave me, and I began drinking in high school... even stooping to getting drunk at "pit parties" and raiding the liquor cabinets of my friends' dads when they weren't around... a life of crime awaited me.

 

After the Giants horrific playoff loss under Jim Fassel in 1997, people in my college dorm wouldn't leave me alone. I was constantly subjected to horrific taunts, and thus began my descent into social awkwardness. To this day, I haven't gone back to school at Rowan University.

 

I almost got into a fight with Michael Strahan before the 2001 season when I said that he was a "good but not great" defensive end, and needed to "shut up and play" and not be so "greedy". Strahan was so upset that he went around telling everyone that he was going to kick my ass, but decided not to do it because it would be bad for the team, and didn't want me to sue him for 98% of his contract.

 

I pleaded with the Giants not to draft Eli Manning, preferring instead that the Giants draft offensive tackle Rob Gallery. Despite several passionate message board pleas, Ernie Accorsi went and drafted him anyway. The rift between me and Accorsi grew from that point on, and our relationship has been strained ever since.

 

 

This, and other exciting revelations will be brought to life when the book is released early next year.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[fringe]

btw, gallery is finding his stride now. they had him out of position.

[BIGBLUE01]

I decided that with the flurry of Giants books out now, I'm going to write one called "Inside the Bachelor Pad," where I describe my 25 years as a lifelong Giants fan. Among the scandalous revelations I plan to include:

 

When the New York Giants won the 1986 Superbowl, my parents and their friends kept me up until 10 PM, when my bedtime was CLEARLY 8:30. The next day, I flunked a Math test in Mrs. Mason's fourth grade class. I never recovered from this and was doomed to suck at math forever, all because my parents let me indulge in my Giants obsession.

 

Later on when the Giants won again in 1990, my dad decided to break open a bottle of Champagne. I had an ENTIRE glass, even though I was only in seventh grade. The taste of alcohol would not leave me, and I began drinking in high school... even stooping to getting drunk at "pit parties" and raiding the liquor cabinets of my friends' dads when they weren't around... a life of crime awaited me.

 

After the Giants horrific playoff loss under Jim Fassel in 1997, people in my college dorm wouldn't leave me alone. I was constantly subjected to horrific taunts, and thus began my descent into social awkwardness. To this day, I haven't gone back to school at Rowan University.

 

I almost got into a fight with Michael Strahan before the 2001 season when I said that he was a "good but not great" defensive end, and needed to "shut up and play" and not be so "greedy". Strahan was so upset that he went around telling everyone that he was going to kick my ass, but decided not to do it because it would be bad for the team, and didn't want me to sue him for 98% of his contract.

 

I pleaded with the Giants not to draft Eli Manning, preferring instead that the Giants draft offensive tackle Rob Gallery. Despite several passionate message board pleas, Ernie Accorsi went and drafted him anyway. The rift between me and Accorsi grew from that point on, and our relationship has been strained ever since.

This, and other exciting revelations will be brought to life when the book is released early next year.

 

 

No mention of the episode where you ran down the street in only your skibbies, wasted off a bottle of Jack Daniels, screaming "Its unfair!" after the 5 INT performance by Collins in the 34-7 bashing in the 2000 SB??

 

[Sephiroth]

No mention of the episode where you ran down the street in only your skibbies, wasted off a bottle of Jack Daniels, screaming "Its unfair!" after the 5 INT performance by Collins in the 34-7 bashing in the 2000 SB??

 

Let's not give away the WHOLE book. Wait till you hear what I did when the Giants imploded vs. the Niners in the playoffs.

[BIGBLUE01]

Let's not give away the WHOLE book. Wait till you hear what I did when the Giants imploded vs. the Niners in the playoffs.

 

Oh my goodness, I hope there were no animals harmed that day.

[Lughead]

I decided that with the flurry of Giants books out now, I'm going to write one called "Inside the Bachelor Pad," where I describe my 25 years as a lifelong Giants fan. Among the scandalous revelations I plan to include:

 

When the New York Giants won the 1986 Superbowl, my parents and their friends kept me up until 10 PM, when my bedtime was CLEARLY 8:30. The next day, I flunked a Math test in Mrs. Mason's fourth grade class. I never recovered from this and was doomed to suck at math forever, all because my parents let me indulge in my Giants obsession.

 

Later on when the Giants won again in 1990, my dad decided to break open a bottle of Champagne. I had an ENTIRE glass, even though I was only in seventh grade. The taste of alcohol would not leave me, and I began drinking in high school... even stooping to getting drunk at "pit parties" and raiding the liquor cabinets of my friends' dads when they weren't around... a life of crime awaited me.

 

After the Giants horrific playoff loss under Jim Fassel in 1997, people in my college dorm wouldn't leave me alone. I was constantly subjected to horrific taunts, and thus began my descent into social awkwardness. To this day, I haven't gone back to school at Rowan University.

 

I almost got into a fight with Michael Strahan before the 2001 season when I said that he was a "good but not great" defensive end, and needed to "shut up and play" and not be so "greedy". Strahan was so upset that he went around telling everyone that he was going to kick my ass, but decided not to do it because it would be bad for the team, and didn't want me to sue him for 98% of his contract.

 

I pleaded with the Giants not to draft Eli Manning, preferring instead that the Giants draft offensive tackle Rob Gallery. Despite several passionate message board pleas, Ernie Accorsi went and drafted him anyway. The rift between me and Accorsi grew from that point on, and our relationship has been strained ever since.

 

 

This, and other exciting revelations will be brought to life when the book is released early next year.

 

first get your facts straight we did not draft Eli we drafted Philip Rivers and then traded for Eli

 

I for one was rooting for Big Ben to be drafted by EA.

[TaylorBanksCarsonVanPelt]

Let's not give away the WHOLE book. Wait till you hear what I did when the Giants imploded vs. the Niners in the playoffs.

I thought that was you on Suicide Watch on my shift at the Psychiatric Hospital....poor guy we couldn't even give him a plastic spork to eat with. But hey we pulled him through it with multiple ECT (Electro-Convulsive Therapy) sessions and a healthy dose of four point restraints. Now he only chews the hair on his balls when he hears the name Kerry Collins.

[Lughead]

I thought that was you on Suicide Watch on my shift at the Psychiatric Hospital....poor guy we couldn't even give him a plastic spork to eat with. But hey we pulled him through it with multiple ECT (Electro-Convulsive Therapy) sessions and a healthy dose of four point restraints. Now he only chews the hair on his balls when he hears the name Kerry Collins.

 

 

If he watched the Titans game today he will be coughing up hair balls for a week

[Herc]

if it makes you feel any better we had no shot at gallery at all. the chargers weren't going to trade us the pick, they were only willing to draft eli and trade him to us so we wouldn't take gallery #1 overall--and the raiders were never going to let him slip past 2

[Sephiroth]

I thought that was you on Suicide Watch on my shift at the Psychiatric Hospital....poor guy we couldn't even give him a plastic spork to eat with. But hey we pulled him through it with multiple ECT (Electro-Convulsive Therapy) sessions and a healthy dose of four point restraints. Now he only chews the hair on his balls when he hears the name Kerry Collins. smile.gif

 

True... but I still get naked, rock, and talk to myself when someone brings up Johnnie Lynn, too.

[BIGBLUE01]

True... but I still get naked, rock, and talk to myself when someone brings up Johnnie Lynn, too.

 

Depending on how old you are, wait till they mention Ray Handley.

[TaylorBanksCarsonVanPelt]

If he watched the Titans game today he will be coughing up hair balls for a week

So Chuck and Duck ended up there huh...

[TaylorBanksCarsonVanPelt]

True... but I still get naked, rock, and talk to myself when someone brings up Johnnie Lynn, too.

NO SHOTS!!!! NO SHOTS!!!! HOLD EM DOWN .....HOLD EM DOWN.....IN THE MUSCLE ASSHOLE NOT HIS VEIN......OK now Sephie you are going be alright now....just zone out for the next 12 hours....there that's a good boy.