The Onion cover the Giants Defense

[JMFP]

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—Following the Giants' embarrassing 44-7 loss to the Vikings, 63-year-old head coach Tom Coughlin further manhandled the Giants defense Sunday, scoring two more touchdowns against them during the eight minutes of his season-ending speech. "In the end, Coach [Coughlin] just got the better of us," said defensive end Justin Tuck, who was later caught flat-footed by several reporters who added another touchdown during Tuck's postgame press conference. "He exploited our weaknesses, and we just couldn't stop him. I guess he just wanted it more than we did." Tuck later blamed a porous Giants defense for allowing play-by-play man Bob Papa and color commentator Carl Banks to score two more touchdowns and a field goal during their postgame remarks.

 

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